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Music Blogs

Cheeky Popstars Uncovered

  • By AndyVale
  • 2 June 2013

Is Olly Murs actually cheeky?

He's always called "cheeky". Search 'Olly Murs Cheeky' in Google and you will get 248,000 results. That's nearly 248,001 results!

But is he really cheeky? I don't see how he's cheeky. I think he just grins a lot and often wears a trilby. That's not cheeky, that just means he might be a little bit simple.

The first result you get from that search is him asking out Cheryl Cole on Twitter. Apparently that makes him cheeky. I'd just say it makes him attracted to the most desired woman in pop (at the time). 

 

 

He wrote "lol" and "haha" one after the other.

If that makes you cheeky, then this guy I knew at college must be the cheekiest guy on the planet because he was always trying to get hot girl's numbers and sending them texts with "lol" in. Except he's not cheeky, he's a creepy perv and I'm 99% sure he's on the sex offenders register. I once went to the same fancy dress party as him in a similar outfit, some girl went off on one at me because he'd already drooled over her and she thought I was him. You don't want to be in the same boat as him Olly, I had one experience and it wasn't fun.

"Impudent or irreverent, typically in an amusing way." That's 'cheeky' according to the Oxford Dictionary. Having a girl's name on your bum is none of those things, even if Gary Barlow does think it's genius.

I'd love to be in Gary Barlow's head for a bit. What goes on behind those sad and weary eyes?

Speaking of the GB, his pal Robbie Williams was always cheeky too. Why? All I could gather was that it was because he did drugs and slept with lots of famous women but still made music that a lot of Mums liked. He was their sons friend that they secretly fancied.

"Oh my, Robert was lively today wasn't he? Such a cheeky young man."

"No Mum, he was buzzing off his tits. He has a serious problem and should seek help."

"Yes, he should definitely take his shirt off more."

That was an awkward Christmas.

Just for the numbers I thought I'd search "Robbie Williams Cheeky" into Google, 356,000. But the first story caught my eye. "Cheeky Robbie Williams Shows Willy!" AHHH! A video is loading, scroll down! That's called exposing yourself. There was an old woman doing that outside Highbury & Islington tube station on Friday night. I didn't think it was a cheeky act. I think she mainly wanted money and perhaps had several very deep-seated issues that I'm not willing to joke about.

So who is cheeky?

Mikill Pane, that's who. He's one of the finest and smartest lyricists out there at the moment. Here's a cut from his new single.

"It's the wrong day to phone girls, they're fiancees.
I'd give them a ring but they're all engaged.
"

Boom! Every song of his is littered with word play like that. Some of it is definitely cheeky.

"Can't go for a ride 'cause my bike's fucked up.
I consult my neighbor and see if he can fix it,
Doesn't think the problem can be solved today
'Cause it involves more labour than Miliband triplets.
"

Listen you mongrels:

Man, I love Mikill Pane.

There was little point to this. I'll get back to writing lists soon...

Andy is a Supajam writer who has been a small-fry at numerous Commerical, BBC and Student radio stations over the last 6 years. He is also a music promoter in the South-East of the UK. He has a website where he interviews musicians with only one question, and he is currently typing in third-person. You can tweet abuse at him if you fancy letting off some steam.

 

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