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'Nightlife is shite' Muslim guy gives Mecca 25 star review on Tripadvisor: we review Christmas.

'Nightlife is shite' Muslim guy gives Mecca 2/5 star review on Tripadvisor: we review Christmas.

A Muslim man has given Mecca, the Islamic holy city a 2 out of 5 star review on TripAdvisor after attending as part of the culmination of the holiday Hajj.

One of the major criticism of religion is its failure to move out of dogma and into the 21st Century, and it is something as minor as Aamer Kaleel honestly reviewing the holy city of Mecca that is indicative of a brighter, more honest future for organised relgoion.

After paying over £4,000 to attend his first Hajj last week, missing an opportunity to go to Lanzarote with his friends from work. He spent six days focusing on prayer and Islamic rites, while battling against huge crowds and fuck all Wi-Fi.

“I’m going to need a holiday after this. The city itself is beautiful, but it’s just way too packed and there’s no good restaurants and the nightlife is shite. If you’re looking for non-stop praying and getting shoved around then I guess it’s ok, but I expected more for the price of it. Oh, and don’t get me started on the Muslims from Germany who would get up early in the morning and reserve all the good praying spots by laying their prayer rugs on the ground, the bastards”.

It got us thinking that, with this new movement of clarity, we could be of great use to people who were diving into other holidays blindlly. So we decided to write a review or two, in an honest and frank way, of last year's Christmas.


I've put on half a stone from eating cheese, crackers and continually drinking discount beer for a week this Christmas. Not only that, but because I'm from a large family, I spewed out around £200 on gifts for people and only really received a few things I wanted: some shoes and a bit of vinyl (got bought the same one twice by two different people). My sister and her husband cooked the roast this year. It was way too oily and nutmeggy, despite the fact he was once a chef in a major restaurant. I only got that Christmas feeling once, and that was when on my own watching the 'Muppets Christmas Carol' on Christmas Eve. Shops are packed, people are drunk(er than usual) and it will remind you of your mortality. Don't believe the hype. Up Easter.

Ok... So whilst the original TripAdvisor review may not have been real, ours totally was.

Go to TripAdvisor.com and review a religious holiday.

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